Games In The Mess Hall Part One
by 1peacekeeper1
Summary: What happens when you get everyone together in the mess hall, add one crazy girl, and games? You get SBNTDMHG! See inside for detail. Please R
1. Chapter One: Truth Or Dare

Games In The Mess Hall

Part One: Truth Or Dare

A/N: I do not own anything that has to do with the Matrix. Just Soni.

Chapter One Truth or Dare

Everyone sat in the mess hall waiting for Soni to arrive. They had received messages the night before to meet her there as soon as it was dark. Ten minutes later she quietly opened the door. "Well it's about time! Why are we here?" asked Cypher leaning against the wall. "All in good time friends, now where is Morpheus?" "He's taking the first watch." Said Tank. "Well, that's okay I guess. We can just go on without him." "Go on with what?" "Chill Apoc, I'm about to tell everyone." She sat down at the empty chair and helped herself to some Goop. "Eww, so as you all know, there really hasn't been much to do for a while. So what I've done to make this a more pleasurable experience is come up with something we can do." "And that would be?" Jeez Apoc, have patience or I will shun you for a week." "Not again." "Then hush and let me finish!" "Yes ma'am." "For the next couple of days, until something attacks us or we need to be plugged up, we are going to participate in *drum roll* Soni's So-Bored-Nothing-To-Do-Mess-Hall Games!"

"You've got to be kidding me!" Trinity got up to leave. "Oh Trinny, I wouldn't leave if I were you dear." "Why?, and don't call me that." "Anyone who doesn't participate in SBNTOMHG has to face an Agent with no weapons and…naked!" The part about no weapons didn't bother Trinity, it was the second part she sat back down on. "That's what I thought, now the first game is going to be Truth or Dare, a simple game but the stakes are high." "What's Truth or Dare?" "Honestly Tank, you need to get out more. But for all those who don't know Truth or Dare is a game where you take turns asking someone 'truth or dare?' duh. If the person says truth they have to answer a question and no matter the question, they have to answer truthfully, hence the word 'truth'. If the person says dare, and this is the best part, that person has to do whatever the other person tells them to do." "Huh?" "Okay, brain-dead Mouse, for example, if you picked dare and I told you to um let's see, run up to Morpheus and kissed him you would have to do it." "And what if we don't want to do this?" asked Switch noticing the scared look on Mouse's face.

"Well then you're lives end up in my hands and I get to pick the proper punishment for defiling my orders!" "You're crazy to think any of us are going to go through with this." Yelled Cypher opening the door. Soni gave a fake melodramatic sigh. "Alright then, I just thought it would bring us closer together as a family and be something fun we could do." She sniffled a bit for effect. "Oh shit, you know I hate it when you do that Soni." "Then close the door and let's get on with it." Cypher reluctantly closed the door and took his place at the table. Alright, the rules are simple: say the truth, do the dare and there'll be no trouble. Okay?" Everyone nodded their heads. "Alrighty then, who is brave enough to start the game?"

Just to get it over with, Dozer raised his hand. "Very good Dozzy. First, choose who you want to ask the question to." He looked at everyone's murderous faces, death would surly come to him if he picked the wrong person. "Uh…Tank?" "Good, now Tank, you choose truth or dare." "Nice going Dozer, I guess I pick…truth." "Brave choice, but I was sure you were a 'dare' kinda guy. Anyways, Dozer give your brother a question." Silence filled the mess hall as everyone was suddenly interested in playing the game. "Soni, I don't know want to say." "Fair enough, I'll think of something." "I don't think that's fair!" "Hush Tank!" She took a second to think then whispered the question into Dozer's ear. "I can't say that!" "Do it!" "Fine, Tank have you ever slept with anyone that was…ugh…male?" "WHAT?! You think I'm gay or something?" "Tank as long as you're truthful you can say no all you want." "NO, NO, NO!" "Alright, we got the message. Now it's your turn. Ask someone the question."

"I pick…Mouse." "Awww, why me?" "Cause I think you deserve it and cause anyone else I picked would kill me instantly." "You got that right!" said Switch putting her knife back in her pocket. "I pick dare." "Oh goody, now people, the fun begins." "Okay, I dare you to come up behind Switch and grabbed her ass." "Whoo! That's how you do it Tank! Right on!" "If you touch me Mouse I swear you'll never see the light of day ever again!" "Eep!" "No, no this is not how you play, Switch you have to let him otherwise he can't complete the dare." "I couldn't care less!" "Then say hello to Smith for me!" "NO!...fine but we never speak of this to anyone!" "Nothing said here goes out of the mess hall, promise." "Mouse, make it quick!" Switch stood up and closed her eyes tightly. Mouse timidly staggered over to her and lightly touched her butt. "STOP! Tank said to grab it, not poke it!" yelled Soni. "Do it Mouse!" yelled Cypher smiling. "ALRIGHT!" with both hands her grabbed both cheeks and squeezed. "Oww!" He couldn't seem to let go. "Mouse…let go of her!" said Soni looking worried. "I-I can't!" Apoc and Dozer pulled his hands off Switch while she moved to the corner and quietly sobbed.

"Good, that wasn't so bad was it?" Easy for you to say!" "Alright, if we can all get back to our seats, I believe it's Mouse's turn." Everyone sat down including Switch and the game continued. "I pick Trinity." "Damn. I guess truth." "Okay, is it true that you and Cypher had a one night stand at that Zion party last week?" "Um…no." "Hah, I knew it! You're lying!" "Trinity you have to tell the truth otherwise you ruin the fun of the game." "But we didn't!" "That's not what you said last week!" said Cypher a little too calm. "DEAR GOD!" "Trinity you didn't!" "No, it's not true! Cypher and I did nothing!" "Alright! Trinity, since you can't seem to tell the truth, you have to pay the piper." "What?" Soni got up and casually walked over to Trinity's chair. "The punishment is…*scary music*…this!" She pulled a small vial out of her pocket and handed it to Trinity. "And what is it?" "You have to drink this and wait two minutes." "But what is it?" "That is not part of the punishment." Trinity turned the vial in her fingers watching the brown liquid fall. "One question, is this going to kill me?" "No, as far as I know."

"Great." Everyone watched without blinking as Trinity downed the liquid. "Yuck." "Now, we wait." Not even two minutes passed before Trinity gave a horrible groan and ran for the bathroom. Soni fell to the floor laughing. "Oh, I can't believe the look on her face." She said between breaths. "What in the world did you give her Soni?" asked Dozer stifling a laugh. "a laxative!" "What!" "Yeah remember Dozer? You gave it too me when I ate that…well when I was clogged." "Yeah, I thought you took it." "Nope, just let nature run it's course, but I can I see that it works better as a torture item. They couldn't hold it in any longer, the whole mess hall was filled with uncontrollable laughter.


	2. Chapter 2: T&Dagain

Chapter Two T&D…Again

Trinity never did come back and everyone was starting to worry. "I guess we gotta continue the game without her." Said Soni feeling sorry. Just then Morpheus came into the mess hall. "What's the matter with Trinity?" "Whatever do you mean Morphy?" "What's with you and nicknames? Anyways she's been in the bathroom for a long time and she keeps yelling these unmentionable things she's going to do to Soni over her extremely loud flatulence." There was a small laugh at the mention of the word 'flatulence' but was silenced as Morpheus stared angrily at everyone. "What?" Soni asked when Morpheus looked right at her. "I know you have something to do with this. You're always getting into trouble and causing it." "We're just having fun, and Trinity ruined it by lying." "Do what?" "We were playing Truth or Dare." Tank cut in. "Yeah and Trinity lied when she was asked a question." Added Mouse. "What was the question?" "If she and Cypher slept together last week." Apoc said.

"Well everyone in Zion knows that." "Yeah, I told them it was true and she still denied it." At that moment Trinity stumbled into the mess hall looking skinnier then usual. "Are you okay?" asked Switch looking concerned. "Do-I-Look-Okay?" "You look like you're dying." "No thanks to you Soni!" "Hey, you're the one who lied, that was the rule of the game." Trinity took a step towards Soni but Morpheus stopped her. "Trinity, why don't you take the second watch." "Fine, but this isn't over Soni!" She slammed the door and Morpheus took her seat. "So what is Truth or Dare exactly?" Soni explained the rules to Morpheus for the second time. "Okay, well are you still playing?" "I guess so, sure, are you guys in?" "Well I am." Said Tank. "Me too." Said Dozer. "Alright, let's continue. Since Trinity um…forfeit someone else needs to go, and what brave soul would that be?" Apoc raised his hand. "Okay, pick your victim." "How about uh…Switch." "Hey, when am I going to go?" yelled Soni. "When you're picked now hush!" Apoc yelled back.

"Okay, I pick dare." "Seems to be a pattern going on here." "Yeah, am I'm out of laxatives so let's hope this goes well." "I dare you to um go to the bathroom and stay in there for five minutes." "You've got to be kidding me!" "Oh, this is going to be so good. Nice dare Apocy." "Please, enough with the names, and thank you." "I'll die!" "Hey you picked dare." "Alright, I'll do it!" Mouse gasped and almost fainted. "Alright, who has a watch?" "I do." Said Tank holding out his arm to reveal a very cute but manly Mickey Mouse watch. "Aww, well anyways let's get to it." Everyone followed Switch to the bathroom but already they could smell the putrid stench as soon as they left the mess hall. "God, we've got to stop eating that Goop." Said Dozer holding his nose. Everyone stood back as Switch quickly opened the door and stepped inside. Soni put her hand to her forehead. "There goes a brave solider. I salute you." Not even thirty seconds into it Switch started screaming and coughing. "Let me out!" "The punishment is worse if you don't complete a dare!" Soni yelled.

"This is killing me!" she coughed louder and gagged. Just the sound of it made Soni feel sick. About two minutes had passed and already Switch had puked twice. "Maybe we should get her out." "No Tank, she chose dare and that's what she got." "Fascinating game. Whatever you tell someone, they have to do it." "Yes Morpheus, a fascinating game it is." "Apoc, sarcasm does not become you." "Shut up Soni." "Touchy." "One more minute Switch." "Hurry, I don't know how much longer I can do this!" "You big baby! How hard could it be?" "You ever smelt rotten meat?" "Yeah." "It's a million times worse." "That bad huh?" "That's it Switch you can come out!" yelled Tank and he opened the door letting out all kinds of horrors. As the smell reached everyone's nostrils they all fainted.

* * *

After everyone came too, the hurried back to the mess hall and breathed fresh air (well as fresh as the ship's air could be). "Oh my God, I'm so sorry Switch, I had no idea how bad that was." "It's okay Apoc, just remember we don't speak of this outside this room." "You can count on that." Soni got everyone a glass of water and continued the game. "Okay, now that the nightmare is over, Switch, it's your turn." "Okay, I pick you." "YES! IN YOUR FACE MORPHEUS!" "Just chose and shut up!" "Dare!" "And so ends the pattern." "Yes, I've got to find something really horrible to do to you!" "Great, I can't wait to hear it." She said very un-sarcastically. "Okay, I got it! You have to run around the entire ship…butt naked and not only that but you have to sing Uncle F***er while dancing around in circles." "Wow, I just wow I never thought you would come up with that. That's almost as good a dare I would've come up with." "Almost?" "Yea, duh I'm the queen of dares and I except your challenge!"

She didn't even wait for the guys to leave, she stripped down to nothing and went over the Uncle F***er song a couple of times in her mind. "Are we ready?" "She's hot!" "Shut up Mouse." She started from the mess hall door and went around, avoiding the bathroom of course then went up to where Trinity was and danced and sang in front of her face. "Gah, what are you doing?" "Doing a dare of course." "Get away from me sicko." "Hey, yell at Switch, she's the one that made me do it!" "Get away or I'll shot you!" "Fine." She ran to the back of the ship, around the chairs, next to the monitors, then back down to the mess hall. "Wow!" said Apoc barely breathing from laughing so hard. "I didn't think you would do it." "Don't mess with the queen." She put her clothes back on except her boots and turned toward Morpheus. "Alright, you're next. Truth or dare?" "I pick truth." "Boring, okay um have you ever stuck a banana up your ass and sing the Peanut Butter Jelly Time song?" "Uh no I don't think so Soni." "Oh okay just checking."

"O—kay, so I guess it's my turn. I pick Cypher." "Duh, I'm the only one that hasn't gone." "Oh, well I still chose you so what's your pleasure?" "Dare." "Okay, first go check on Trinity, then come back here." "Alright." He came back a few minutes later. "She's asleep." "Good." "Good? What if something attacks us?" "Nothing is, now here take this." He hands Cypher a black Sharpie. "What do I do with this?" "Go up to Trinity and draw a French mustache and goatee on her face." "Alright I will." Everyone waited while Cypher went to do his dare. He came back and handed the Sharpie to Morpheus. "Alright, the goatee may be a little crooked cause she moved while I was drawing it, but the mustache is perfect." Very good, no go wake her up and tell her Morpheus wants to talk to her." "Okay." He woke her up and brought her down to mess hall. When she entered the room everyone fell to the floor convulsed with laughter. "What's so funny?" Not only did Cypher draw the mustache, which by the way was the perfect rendition of a Frenchman, plus the crooked goatee, but he also wrote 'I Touch Myself' on her forehead. The perfect ending to a great game of Truth or Dare

End Part One of Games In The Mess Hall


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